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A few thoughts...

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A few thoughts...

Postby hollyinpa » Wed Sep 16, 2009 8:35 pm

I was reminded today that this forum was created to be a place that people could gather and share their thoughts re: Brandi and her music.

This forum should be safe and welcoming for all fans. This forum, for many of us, is the ONLY place that we can be ourselves...truly.

We are all entitled to our own opinions.

What one of us finds inspiring/artistic may very well be considered uninspiring to others....that's just how life is. If we all agreed on everything all the time we'd be boring, wouldn't we?

Our differences - despite our common love of BC's music - are what makes this forum quite special.

We can't expect everyone to get along and be best buddies....that would be unrealistic. What we do expect is that, when we disagree, that we do so in a manner that is respectful.

We need to remember that we all were drawn to BC and were passionate (and many of us still are) about her music. It's what drew us to AT.com.

Sorry for the sermon, but I have spent the last hour "processing" some things that have happened lately that are forum-related and that I've had a hand in.

I challenge you all to reflect a bit on why we are all here and what kind of message we want to send to fans that find their way to this forum called AT.com.
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Postby mele » Wed Sep 16, 2009 11:00 pm

You're right. I know that I come off as abrasive sometimes so it's always good to get a little reminder about respecting others and making people feel welcome.

I think the thing that always causes me to stop and think is when I remember that, most often, people live different lives and their motivations and ways of expressing themselves may be different from mine, but that does not mean that they are wrong. They have every right to be who they are and allowed to feel comfortable and welcome. I know that AT is a place where this should be allowed and I would never want my bad behavior (of which there is plenty) to reflect on Brandi, Tim or Phil in any way.

You've given me much to think over, Holly.
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Postby ST » Thu Sep 17, 2009 1:10 am

I'm guilty of lots of "inside joke" type of conversations, where I've just seen ATers at a concert and we bring that back to the board. I'm sure it doesn't make sense to the general public, and that could be off-putting.

I'll try to be more cognizant of that from now on.
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Postby falling*out » Thu Sep 17, 2009 3:59 am

did I miss something? probably... what a time to not have time to read all the new posts.

p.s. if I'm ever being a jerk someone just needs to tell me.
"What you do not like when done to yourself, do not do to others." - Confucius
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Postby kookie21 » Thu Sep 17, 2009 4:48 am

i concur.

(can't think of a longer way to put that. i am not awake properly). this is probably the best forum I have ever been a part of, and I hope that continues.
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Postby hollyinpa » Thu Sep 17, 2009 8:21 am

As this motley crew of BC-lovin' fans grows...and it will grow exponentially (IMHO) after this new album drops...I think we'll continue to find that people from all walks of life are drawn to the music that we all love.

The challenge will be in continuing on with a level of respect and civility that allows everyone to participate...not IN SPITE of their differences or opinions, but BECAUSE of those differences and opinions.

We are proud to have this spam-free community here. I don't know of another one like this...

The last thing we want to become is a platform where people insult one another and judge one another and lose sight of what has brought us here in the first place. So many other forums/chatrooms/etc have become places of HATE and DISCRIMINATION and they breed that kind of thinking.

I can't say enough about how much this community has come to mean to me. I've heard it from so many of you, as well. Let's continue on the right road and keep AT.com safe and fun.

What would I do without you guys?

Thanks for listening and I appreciate your comments. I've been thinking a lot about this lately... :wink:
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Postby suzansc » Thu Sep 17, 2009 8:50 am

I too am guilty of inside jokes. I put inside jokes on AT and facebook all the time. So if I have bothered peeps, I am sorry.

I will answer Holly's challenge of reflecting on why I am on againtoday.
I joined AT during a time of transition. I had NEVER been on a forum; I was lost for the first few weeks. I signed up thinking I would never actually meet any of you. Through my first few months on the forum, I started noticing this pattern. I had more in common with some of the ATers then my own set of friends. "crap- I am becoming attached to these cyber people". Againtoday is where I go to unwind, to chill out, to catch up, I can be myself, we are all these little therapists reaching out to help and console. As a group we have gone through a lot. Deaths, break-ups, health scares, people losing jobs.... you name it. Some of us have been on AT longer then other's. Steph loves to throw that in my face :) So some of us know each other better. Seeing that I live in Orlando, I miss out on the PNW fun that some ATers experience. But I love reading the stories and looking at the pictures from the cruises... You guys are my friends, and I come to AT to "make new friends but keep the old, one is silver (the old people) and the other gold (the rich people).

I hope that made sense, I have broken up a cat fight, brushed my teeth and let a man into my condo during this post.
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Re: A few thoughts...

Postby magnolia8727 » Thu Sep 17, 2009 10:54 am

hollyinpa wrote:This forum should be safe and welcoming for all fans. This forum, for many of us, is the ONLY place that we can be ourselves...truly.

We need to remember that we all were drawn to BC and were passionate (and many of us still are) about her music. It's what drew us to AT.com.

I challenge you all to reflect a bit on why we are all here and what kind of message we want to send to fans that find their way to this forum called AT.com.


Thanks for the reminder, Holly. AT really has become my outlet, and the one place I really can be myself. Being in a room with dozens of other AT'ers at Raise the Roof was incredibly inspiring, because it was one of the few times that I felt that I could be completely myself, and not have to edit, second guess and try to remain unnoticed.

I've made some great friends through AT, and hope to make many more as the band gains more exposure, more fans and more AT'ers.
.:Laura:.

I'll never be the same because we met.
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Postby itsalrightnow » Thu Sep 17, 2009 12:15 pm

I'd just like to say that I am consistently impressed and thankful for everyone's generosity, kindness and support via this form. I've only been a member since the end of May, and felt like an "ATer" almost immediately.
"i think maybe i've never felt more alive."
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Postby PJ » Thu Sep 17, 2009 2:57 pm

that didn't sound like a sermon to me. thank you for all you do.
If I've offended anyone, it wasn't my intention.I'm truly sorry if I have. and If I do in future please let me know. I don't get the inside jokes and that's ok. I enjoy coming here and seeing everyone's pics, videos, reading their stories. while I may not know anyone here, besides meeting Magnolia, I've always felt welcome. BCB has an amazing bunch of diverse/dedicated fans here. and i'm glad I stumbled upon AT. much like BCB you all make me laugh and think. So thanks.

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Postby justjess » Thu Sep 17, 2009 7:11 pm

I am fairly new to posting to the AT forum. I joined several months ago and have read off and on, never really jumping in. However, after my second (yes, only second..I am near KC) BC concert, I felt a stronger connection with her music and her as an artist than I ever have before. So, for me, I felt the need to communicate and be a part of something that was bigger than myself and share musings with people that share the same interest in BC.

So, I said all that just to say this. I love this forum. Everyone is super nice that I can tell so far. Sure, every can have their moments, but it's human nature. We keep on, keepin on. :)

Happy to be a part of Again Today.
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Postby DobroEllie » Thu Sep 17, 2009 10:44 pm

You're my family, you're my people, some days you're all I've got. You guys mean the world to me, this includes new boardies too, and if I ever say something out of line please call me on it. 'Cause I'm a kid and it's how we learn. :wink:

Thank you for being such amazing friends. I don't know what I'd do without you.
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Postby pugmama » Fri Sep 18, 2009 4:32 am

Well said, my fellow ATers.

I love this forum, and all the friends I have met through it. The years that I have been on the forum have been the best years of my life, all because of you, and you, and you, and you!
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Postby docjake » Tue Sep 22, 2009 2:50 pm

I was on a forum for a different artist previously and decided to leave because a few of the members were just plain mean. Then I found this forum. I would like to say that all I've ever felt on this forum was compassion and kindness from its members. And I thank you all for that. Plus ya'll crack me up!!
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Postby Kaylyn » Tue Sep 22, 2009 4:33 pm

docjake wrote:I was on a forum for a different artist previously and decided to leave because a few of the members were just plain mean.


That's pretty much what happened with me as well. I haven't left there, but basically stopped posting because everything I posted was being snarked at by the same couple of people. I appreciate not having that here, and feel very welcome.
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Postby Crystal Dawn » Sat Oct 03, 2009 1:17 am

docjake wrote:I was on a forum for a different artist previously and decided to leave because a few of the members were just plain mean.


I've had this experience, too. It was hard to get to know anyone because everyone already knew everyone there. Being a newcomer wasn't easy. A lot of the members there were also quite Elitist. I can understand slipping into a comfortable feeling because you've been a huge fan of your favorite artist for what feels like forever. And while it's true you probably know everything you can possibly know about that artist, your attitude speaks volumes. It can on the entire group of fans, in general.
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Postby llaura » Sun Oct 04, 2009 11:02 am

Crystal Dawn wrote:
docjake wrote:I was on a forum for a different artist previously and decided to leave because a few of the members were just plain mean.


I've had this experience, too. It was hard to get to know anyone because everyone already knew everyone there. Being a newcomer wasn't easy. A lot of the members there were also quite Elitist. I can understand slipping into a comfortable feeling because you've been a huge fan of your favorite artist for what feels like forever. And while it's true you probably know everything you can possibly know about that artist, your attitude speaks volumes. It can on the entire group of fans, in general.


This is related - or maybe not. I think Brandi's inclusive attitude is reflected in the forum. I sometimes think about how many artists I've seen make it big that ride their egos straight to the top. But Brandi seems intent on taking everyone with her - and I mean everyone. Mom, Dad, Caroline, the Twins Dad, Josh, Alli, Uncle Sonny, Tiffany, her high school friends that take care of the merch table or set up the stage. I think that's charming.
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Postby areslei » Thu Oct 08, 2009 1:12 pm

falling*out wrote:did I miss something? probably... what a time to not have time to read all the new posts.

p.s. if I'm ever being a jerk someone just needs to tell me.


ditto on that. sometimes i have trouble stating exactly what it is i want to say, and it may come off as serious or snippy. in truth, i'm a smart ass, though not a malicious one. if i have ever offended anyone or anyone's opinion, I am sorry and feel free to call me out on it.
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Postby bexsville » Fri Oct 09, 2009 9:10 pm

itsalrightnow wrote:I'd just like to say that I am consistently impressed and thankful for everyone's generosity, kindness and support via this form. I've only been a member since the end of May, and felt like an "ATer" almost immediately.


^^^^^^^^^^
Couldn't have put it better myself... I joined the forum in March and almost immediately felt a connection to many of you (which believe me, unsettled me a little at first) I'd never seen myself as one to share in cyberspace. However, I got over it and as more and more people welcomed me it encouraged me to kick off my shoes and get comfortable (which I'm doing slowly - the laces are undone and one shoe is half off).

As a British ATer we miss out on many of the meet-ups that you guys post about so regularly - but I think is one part of the community that I love the most - There is never any bragging about your most recent concert or band meet-up but merely a sharing of your experiences and memories with your ATer friends (those you have met and those that you know through the wonder of this forum) with the bonus being that you know your fellow ATers will just 'get it'.

This forum has brought together a unique group of individuals, for the love of the same thing - music that not only touches you but digs deep into your soul and forces you to anguish and relive every note and every word.

RTR in September for me was day it hit me - not only was the event truly amazing (BCB who absolutely rocked) but here I was thousands of miles away from home in a room of people that I had never met before, yet I felt more at home than I had for years. I was blessed to meet some awesome ATers. Unfortunately for me (and of course many of you!!!) and through nothing more than my own reticence, I admit, I didn't meet enough of you and hopefully, over time that will change (I'm all for more holidays!). N.B. Mele I realised when I got home that I had been talking to you in the queue for Brandi's autograph for about 10 minutes but never introduced myself #-o .

AT has become a part of my life and when I'm reading posts I feel like I am actually just catching up with friends about a crappy day at work, sharing a joke heard in the corridor or supporting through a troubled time.

AT gives each of us the opportunity to demonstrate our understanding and respect for people as individuals - who they are and what they believe (whether you agree or disagree with their views). We all live our lives on different plains and the diversity that this brings to AT is something that we should strive never to lose.

Thank you AT for all that you are and all that I know you will become... more importantly, thank you ATers ;> x
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Postby DobroEllie » Fri Oct 09, 2009 10:27 pm

bexsville said that so well, it has me wondering...would it be weird for me to post my essay about how much I love AT here?
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Postby smallred » Fri Oct 09, 2009 10:45 pm

Have to say that bexsville said a lot of what I feel too. I've always been a lurker...online and in life too...I tend to like to observe and only pipe up when there's something factual to be said (like the "look what I found" thread). I never intended to venture into the General Discussion threads but you guys are so fun and interesting that is was hard not to get sucked in when I poked my head in. I like to pop in throughout the day now just to see what's going on...and yeah, I've even posted a few things which is so unlike me.

This year has been full of new experiences, and it kind of started when I joined AT...
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Postby GJenkins05 » Sat Oct 10, 2009 1:17 am

It is always a fine line to walk with fan communities and the times the fanbase expands due to album releases and the like. I've had a few previous experiences with it and it is always interesting to see how the people who have been around for a while react to the new faces.

It is understandable for those people who have been around a long time to share a special bond and to bond together in their interactions. Those people have probably traveled to several shows together, had some great experiences, and have really been a part of each others lives for years. Those experiences and friendships are often part of discussions and other things shared on the forum.

The thing that separates great fan communities from those not so great are the communities where those established people make you feel welcome to post, no matter how infrequently or what you want to post about.

I have definitely seen those positive aspects from those of you in this community. I feel like I have the freedom to share my thoughts, opinions, and make posts and become a productive member of the community if I so chose to do so.

That perception is one of the reasons I am here. One of those life-long friends I made from my previous experience with music message boards raved about how great of a community this was and I decided to check it out for myself. I never came in with the expectation that I'd be a thriving member of the community or someone who people posted replies to when I posted things, but everyone has been very nice and cordial. It is highly appreciated and actually makes me want to post more. :)
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Postby bexsville » Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:00 pm

DobroEllie wrote:bexsville said that so well, it has me wondering...would it be weird for me to post my essay about how much I love AT here?


You should :D :D
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Re: A few thoughts...

Postby thejaneomahs » Mon Aug 11, 2014 9:30 pm

You're right, this should be a space where people can feel involved and comfortable sharing their thoughts.
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